Videoke killed the radio star
You find yourself watching the beautiful sunset in the middle of a very luxurious mansion surrounded by powdery white sand and lush green palm trees nestled in the clear blue sea while immersed in a large jacuzzi with champagne, strawberries, and the most delectable treats ever known. Then, while adjusting the volume of your favorite soothing music played by the surround sound system in your island, you hear the most appalling noise which would make a crow's squawking a way better option to listen to - an out-of-tone leprechaun singing along the lines of "my, my, my Dilailahhhh, why, why, why Dilailahhhh, so bipor they cam to brik down the dor, porgive me dilailah I jast couldn't tik eny morrrr.."
Suddenly you wake up and saw that you're back from your dingy little room, realizing that it's all just a dream, uhhh, well, except that the leprechaun's voice you heard in your dream is real. Your leprechaun of a neighbor is acually singing his favorite videoke song, Tom Jones' half a century old song Delilah. And no, he's not inside of his house next to yours... He is actually OUTSIDE of his house next to your room.
As if that wasn't tormenting enough, that lame dimwitted neighbor of yours brought along his aggravating comrades to show off his brand new third-class videoke system complete with that ta-da-da-da-da tune after every song while the score for the person who sang appears. The crappy songs they sing are coupled with Gold Eagol (eagle) Beer and fried dog meat to come up with some ugly drunk big-bellied pigs sqweaking with all their might as the lyrics of their favorite songs run through their screen. It's like as if the end of the world is close and singing is the only way that could save them. Bah!
If there's anything more annoying than a marching band waking me up in the middle of my sleep, it's my next-door neighbor singing the most annoying songs at the top of their lungs with their utterly annoying off-tune voices and severely damaged word pronunciation. And to make it worse, they're doing this outside, right beside my bedroom window. I don't get it as to why some people would love to showcase their pathetic ability to sing so loud to the rest of the world, creating the worst case of noise pollution and disturbing others who are peacefully living. I don't get it as to why do they need to turn the volume of their speakers so loud when they don't need to do that to hear their songs clearly. And I don't get how they become so confident to sing that loud when their voices could not even compete with a dying pig's squeal, and how they could let their neighbors be tortured by that. Jeez, how inconsiderate and obnoxious.
That happened on a Monday (well, except the dream). In fact, it all started a week before but thankfully, it was a time for me to get up and go to work but that Monday after it all began was a total nightmare. I needed a good sleep after I got dizzy from work and since it took me a couple of hours to finally doze off, imagine how the room exploded with fury when I heard my dear neighbor started to turn on his ever loving videoke machine, singing his favorite Delilah song again (twice), waking me up in a field of dancing stars. Motivated with my rage, I opened the window in my room and yelled (they couldn't hear me if I talk softly) to turn the volume of their effing videoke machine down. I glared at them, the 3 stupid guys, with their round beer bellies joyfully bouncing and faces that looked like a cross between a goat's ass and manure.
After I told them to turn the volume down, they just stared, completely clueless looking dumb as if they haven't done anything for the last 40 years of their lives. I don't know at that time if they are total retards or what but I have to explain to them the way that you explain to a 3-year-old kid to lower the volume of their stupid videoke machine because it's disturbing to the neighbors, especially to me because I needed to rest, and no one is happy to hear some swines singing. They asked for me to just give them this chance to enjoy because it's a Sunday. Sunday, huh? These good for nothing fat geezers don't even know what day it is. It was a one fat Monday and they didn't know. I guess they don't have jobs other than to sing and drink on a Monday. I wonder how hard their wives and children work just to give them money for booze and the time of their lives.
They finally lowered the volume down after I didn't quit badgering them and before I could pick my cat's poo to throw at them. All the time and strength that was wasted. Grr..
That wasn't the last time that my neighbor had expressed his passion to sing for everyone to hear but luckily for me (or them), I wasn't home. My poor peanut, yuki, and killer were the ones who suffered at those times but before I could destroy my neighbor's dream, his videoke machine strangely disappeared.
What's more unfortunate is that there are more and more neighbors who satisfied their envy and bought their own videoke system. They're like mushrooms sprouting out in a sudden. Gawsh, there was one on the other side of the street who displayed their videoke system outside and countless desperate duck- and pig- voiced monkeys who cannot pronounce one english or tagalog word correctly had sung nonstop (read: non-stop) for 2 days and one night. Good thing they are not so near for their disturbance to penetrate the walls of my room. They've stopped after that, don't know where their videoke machine had gone (probably sold it). As far as I know, there are 6 different houses in my neighborhood that have (or had) videoke machines to this date.
But I've had it, I can't live with this kind of neighborhood. If looks could only kill all the noisy neighbors would perish. My mom is the one who got worried because my neighbors might fry me and make me their food to match the beer.
The world would be a more hellish place if every block is infested by loud, inconsiderate, self-centered, off-tuned videoke machine singers. If they could only realize the there's a button to adjust the volume of the speakers and that they could create their mini-concert hall INSIDE their houses without maxing out the volume, this would be a better world. I don't know if it's lack of education or etiquette is the reason why there are people like this, or the fact that most of them live in the squatters area, or just plain ignorance.
posted by archer's world at
21:44
